Reaching Out.

Shah Faisal Mosque, Islamabad.

Khuda Aur Us Ki Bandi



A poem by Meherzaidi.



Aur tu samajhta hai ke mein ne chor diya hai us ko tanha kaise?

Naheen,
Who jo aik laghar si hai boorhi si tanha aurat
Laitee hai, simtee hai, kuch cheetrey phailaaye

Taktee hai tujh ko, mujh ko apnee pathraaee huwee benoor si aankhon se

Woh jo ek laghar si, boseeda si, pasmanda aurat

Basti hai, sisakti hai, Jinnah aspatal ke peek zada footpath ke paas

Mein jo Kulle Makan hoon, apni muthee mein dono jahan ki saari basaat liye
Us ki be jaan si, sisaktee hui siskee suntan hun

Us ki tasbeeh peh hoon Qaim, apni Shaan liye!
“Subhan Allah”
Aur yeh sach hai ke Qaim yuheen azal ta abad
Aur mein us ki sheh rag se bhi qareeb
Qaim, Daa’em
Azal ta abad

Jab who taktee hai musalsal ek tiktakee  bandhe
Mein us kee sheh rag se bhi qareeb hoon us ke
Jab who taktee hai tiktakee bandhe

Aur tu kiyun us ki jaan naheen lota deta?
Aur us ki baste huwee khotee huwee zindagi
Us peek zada foot path ke saaye, saaye
Woh  to sach’chi hai kehtee hai jo
“Subhan Allah”
Aur Mein hota hoon us ki sheh rag se bhi qareeb uskey
Qaim, daa’em
Azal ta abad
Apni saaree khudai ki tamaam shaan liye!


Translation

God and His worshipper woman

Do you think that I have left her all alone yet?
Nay, Not that old, wretched lonely woman
Who lies on the torn shreds of cloth
Alone on the ‘paan’ spit stained footpath
Of the Jinnah hospital.
Who stares with her eyes un-enlightened,
Blind eyes at you and Me
Me, who is everywhere
Me, who has both the worlds in the palm of His hands

I listen to her weak, lamenting cries
I am existent on her repetitive rosary
With my Majestic Presence
When she says “ Subhan Allah”

And this the Truth,
That I exist
From before the beginning to eternity
I am there close to her
Even closer than her aorta
Always present!
Especially when she stares continuously
I am there close to her
Even closer than her aorta

And why do not you return back to her, her life?
Her happy, her sad life
Near the’paan’ stained footpath
She speaks the Eternal  Truth
When she says “Subhan Allah”

I am always there, present,
Closer to her than her own aorta
Always Present
Always There
In all my Godly Majesty!

My Rejected Body, Your Rejected Soul!

Meherzaidi, the poet.

Mere Is Jism Ke Peechey
Aik Rooh Bhi Hai
Aye farsooda insaan, kiya Usey dekh Pao ge?
Mere is Tilism ke peechey
Aik Wujood bhi hai
Kiya usey dekh pao ge
Aye murda Shaitaan?

Haan yeh tumhare zulm-o-jabr
Wehshiana Raqse Besehar
Barjamane mehfil-e Meh -wa-shar
Abhi aur sahee, par ab naheen
Ab Aagayee hai woh Khabar
Ke bas Huwee Umeed-e-Sehr
Ayaan, Zofishan
Ba kull-o -Makaan
Uthaa hai hisaab ba mahshar
Tera wujood ab Hil gaya
Aye zanjeer-e-Rizwan-pa, Shar
Dey hisaab, Dey jawaab
Tere wajood ki azmaaish ki gharhi guzar gayee
Aye Sharri insaan
Ab Chal, abla pa, nang sar,
Tu nahin hai qabile rahm
Apne Khuda ke Huzoor
Wohi Khuda jo sab ka hai
Teri ghari guzar gayee
Ab faisla bhi ho gaya
Yeh Zulum ab khatam hua
Teri gharee guzar gayee
Kiya tu ne socha na tha?
Ye aazmaish-e- jism wa -Jaan
Yuheen nahi hai ham par ayaan
Bas ab na ro, bas ab na dhoondh
Tera raasta bhi band hua
Woh jo zindagi mein ayaan bhi tha
Tera zulm jab fashan bhi tha
Tu to mard tha, khuda bana
Akar, akar ke chalta tha
Aur deewaar mein chunta tha
Mera yeh wujood-e-zarfishan
Tu to mard tha , khuda bana
Bas ab Faisla tau ho chuka
Tera Maqbara tau ban gaya
Tera zulm hai tau likha huwa
Woh waqt gaya, woh waqt gaya
Ke  tu bhi hota maa'fi ka haqdar
Ab woh waqt gaya
Bas ab chal  Suwe Daar
Tere jurm hain ab beshumar
Aur naheen hai ab
Rahe Tauba Khulee

Aye marde-kul, bujha huwa
hai woh diya
Joh jala tha Umeed-e-roshan liye
Ke shayad tu hota sarbakaf
Ba Rahe Taqwa!

Translation :

Can your old, prejudiced eyes see
The soul behind my body?
Can you see clearly
O, corpsed Satan
My existence behind this adorned, magical facade?

Oh yes, you may continue
Your tyrannical savage dance
Imposed in the evil "Mehfil"
But no, not now
Now the news has come
The light of Dawn breaks
All over the universe
A light of Hope!
The apocalypse has arrived
The day of judgement is here
Now shakes the existence of your bieng
That whose feet are now shackled
By the Guardian 'Rizwaan'
Angel of the Heavens
Because of your evil dance.
Give account!
Give an answer!
Passed is the moment of Redemption
O, evil man
Now walk with blistered feet,
Bare -headed in scorching heat
You are forsaken
No mercy.
Present yourself before God
Who is the God of everyone
Your moment of redemption has passed
The judgement is given
Your tyranny has ended
Did you not think before?
Of this exam of body and soul?
Was not in vain!

Do not shed tears now
Do not seek forgiveness
Its late
Your path is sealed
That path which was lightened in your life
When your tyranny was evident
You were a man , pretending to be god
You walked in false pride
And you forsaked me in a brick wall.
You were a man, pretending to be god

Now the judgement is given
Your grave dug
Your tombstone written
Engraved with an obituary
Of tyranny that was your forte.
The time has passed
That time has passed
That you would have been redeemed
Now walk the Cross
Your sins many, uncountable
The path to redemption closed
O, all male
Extinguished is th 'Diya' that burnt bright
With a hope
That you may be ' Sarbakaf'
In the path of fear of God.

"Diya" means oil lamp, "sarbakaf" means ready to die from fear of God that is "Taqwa", "Rizwaan" is guardian angel of heaven. I have included metaphors as references , for example in the story of 'Anarkali" an Indian servant girl with whom the Prince Saleem, son of Emperor Akbar  was put inside the brick wall alive as was custom of punishment in olden India. The fear of God in Islam is known as "Taqwa" out of which man has to do justice and refrain from injustice.
"Mehfil " is the party.
I have written this poem in honour of all the women, children and men and others who have died unsung, unredeemed by us cruel people , who have been hanged, brick layered, murdered , killed , burnt and maimed in the name of honour, in the name of not bearing a male child, in the name of studying and educating, of all the NGO workers especially drivers and poor men and women who were killed by terrorists recently for carrying out their duties to help poor Pakistanis improve their lives, in health and educating. My list will go on and on. There is only hope for people who believe in God that the fear of God may forsake them from injustice , from Karo Kari and other honour killings, from rape and violence and child abuse, from giving unfair treatment to the poor, infirm and the needy. The list goes on and on.

Broken Heart, Shattered Dreams!

My heart is shattered into a thousand splinters
Each splinter sharper than a diamond razor
My life is spread like a splintered crystal goblet
Like pearls of dreams, splintered, shattered
My bleeding feet burn numb into my journey
of fires raging , with hatred and curse
My heart is shattered into a thousand splinters
Each splinter sharper than the sharpest "Khanjar"
I walk this thorne laden path alone,
I weep incessantly
Yet my screams fall on deaf ears
false values, fake smiles, broken promises
And then the world is only a make believe
We think we are "normal" ? O you male and female?
Do we not have to find a living, snatch a respectable life?
Then why this prejudice and false pretension
Always, everywhere love is pure
Pure like a mountain spring
falling, sparkling,
Nurturing, benefitting all who care
And yet there is silence and hate and prejudice
My broken heart and a thousand splinters shattered!

Dil Darwaza Aur Singhar...Heart Door and Vanity!

Aur jab us ne dil darwaza kharkhaya
Woh hone lagi tayyar, karne lagi singhar
Aankh ka kaajal,
Paon ki payal
Haath ki mehndi
Kaan ki baali
Dene lagi gawahee
Surkh labon ki Muskan
Zulfun ka haijan
Uth,tha girta aanchal
Machane laga ek shorish zada halchal
Woh gaal ka til bhi bol raha hai
Ek uljhan zada daastan

Kabhi hanstee thee, kabhi rotee thi
Kabhi jaagti thee , kabhi sotee thi
Aur har lamha sochtee rehtee thi
Aaye ga woh is ko sab kehne
Aur kare gee woh bhi iqraar
Yunhee jaari tha intezar
Har lamha har pal tha beqarar
Thee us ke gulshan mein ajab si bahar
Pur umeed , pur waqar

Aur phir woh kabhee na aya!
Shayad woh  bhool gaya
ke karti thi woh uska intezar!

Woh saare khat jo arsaal huey the
Woh saare parche phaar diye
Kuch roshan daan se phaink diye
Kuch angeethee mein dagh diye

Sab surma daani , hont ki laali
Sab choori mehndi,
Sab paoon ki payal
Sab pethi mein hain bandh diye.
Sab dafan huey hain 
ek heuwla ban kar!

Ab jab bhi sawan aata hai
Aur papeeha shor machata hai
Ek baarish dil par girtee hai
Har boondh hai bojhal zakhmon se
Har soo ek gehra saya hai
 Aur cheekh raha hai sannata
Khamosh hai payal
Gum sum hai bahaar.
Aur band hai dil ka darwaza
Weeran hai piyar ka suna mandir
Hain Umeed ke saye jaala jaala
Jape hai woh bas ek dukh ki maala
Jogan jogan, Raanjha Raanjha
Bhool gayee hai woh Sohni, Heer
Ban ke Sassui, ban ke Shireen
Kitne sawan beet chuke hain
Jab Khula tha dil ka darwaza!

English Translation:

He knocked the door to her heart
She started adorning.
Kohl in her eyes, Anklet in her feet,
Henna in her hands
Earrings bejewelled.
Spoke thus
The sweet smile on her pink lips
The movement of her tresses
Her falling, moving scarf
Evidence of storm ridden torment
Thus speaks the the mole on the cheek
Of the hidden torment!

She laughed and she cried
She lay awake and slept sometimes
And all the while she thought 
That he would come to express his love
And that she would acknowledge
her sweet passion
Thus continued her wait
Each moment a torment, a tempest.
So was her heart's garden in bloom
In a stange elegant anticipation.

But he never came.
Maybe he forgot that she waited.
And all the  letters  were torn to pieces.
Some thrown out of the ventilator
Some burnt in the chimney.
All kohl container,lip stainer,
All bangles, henna,
All anklet, earrings
Put away in the box.
All buried  like ghostly apparitions

And now when the rains arrive
and the Robin tweets endlessly
The rain falls in her heart
each drop heavy with eternal sadness
All around is endless darkness
And screams the eternal silence
Quiet is the anklet,
Silent , the spring.
Closed is her heart's door.
Empty, abandoned
her heart's unadorned mandir.
Her hopes like spider webs
She "japaays" her "dukh maala".
She's the gypsy of love like "Raanjha"
She has forgotten that she is
"Sohni" , "Heer".
She is like "Sasui", "Shireen".
She has forgotten the endless rain seasons that have passed
Since the heart's door was open to love.




 

Bougainvilla Dreams.

Bougainvilla dreams.




Hey, friend

I am neither the dreaded gang or some unfaithful, old woman

I am just Me

A girl who wants to be helpful,

A girl who is simple and straight forward.

I cannot but feel angry

At the strange, mistrustful behaviour

At the calculating, unfriendly eyes

I hate it when you mistrust me

I am simply sincere and loving in my nature

Hey, guy, how are you mistrusting me

And turning your face away

I feel hurt

And I dont care if you are a man, a woman, or simply a person

If you dont care about me

But then I do care

Because I am

Sincere

I am not like the old calculating, double faced women that your very artificial world has aplenty

I am not uncaring

I hate it when in your thoughts you put me on the same level

I hate it, I hate it, I do hate it!

But then why should you care

You have only known me a fleeting moment

Dear,dear friend

Why should you care

In your cold and cold world

Why would there be a place for me

A simple, sincere friend!





A world where your heart cannot be open

A world where conspiracies abound

A world where false pretensions rule.

A world of hate and connivances

A world of treacherous deals

A world of dangerous liasons

A world of death and deciept



I simply cannot function

In such an atmosphere

In such a contaminated environment

I will choke and die simply

Because I am like a bird

I am the bird

That flies and chirps and tweets in my own backyard garden

Free, untainted,

Hopping from bough to bough

Singing from branch to branch

Happy, innocent,

Loving you always

In my bougainvilla dreams!
 
 

The poet Meherzaidi.

 

Sabz Shamein Kidhar Gayeen?

Woh sabz shamein kidhar gayeen hain
Woh zard subhein bikhar gayeen hain
Yeh kaali ratein sulag raheen hain
Tere hi kajal ke dhundhlakon mein
Yeh shehre yaran bujha huwa hai
Yuheen bhatakta chal raha hai
Yeh qafla-e-sarfaroshan halke halke
Woh sabz shamein kidhar gayeen
Jehan tu aur mein bethte the
Sehan mein kursiyaan lagake
Woh ek khushboodar poda
Rakha huwa tha, ajab tarhe se
Hamaree batein sun raha ho jaise 
Hamaree batein, giley naheen the
Na shikwa-e-naalan
Woh zindagi ka aghaaz ho raha tha
Haseen -o hairan
Muhabbaton ka safar shuru hua tha
Woh hanste chehre  damak rahe the
Muhabbaton ka safar shuru hua tha
Ajeeb meetha meetha nasha hua tha
Fareb deta, ghazab ka saaqi
Keh us ki aankho ki mey me behta
Muhabatton ka safar shuru hua tha
Woh mehki shamein
Sulag raheen theen
Muhabatton ka khumar lekar
Woh zard subhein kidhar gayeen
Ke jin ke aanchal mein ham the baithe
Samandaron ka hisaar lekar
Tere us aanchal ki purkashish si bahar lekar
Samandaron ka hisaar lekar
Woh sabz shamein, woh zard subhein
Chalee gayee hein.
Aur ab hain baithe yahan wahan par
Udaas, shabnami wadiyon mein
Bujhe, sulegte diyon ke saaye
Khamosh subhein, sulagte saye
Gali ki weeran seerhiyon par
Ummad rahe hain, sulag rahe hain
Tera, mera gham bhula rahe hain
Yeh jaam-e- surmageen ba khanjar
Dehek rahe hain, sulag rahe hein
Woh tere gham bhi
Woh mere gham bhi
Udaas shamein
Udaas chehre
Tu ab mera paas aa ke bethe
Yehee hai hasrat, yahee dua hai
Bas eik pal ke lamas ki pooja
Inteha hai,ibtida hai
Woh sabz shamein kidhar gayeen hain
Woh zard subhain bikhar gayeen hain. 

Translation:

Where have the twilight evenings gone?

O, where have the twilight evenings gone
O, where have dispersed the yellow mornings?
These dark nights, o, how they smoulder;
In the misty darkness of thine kohl-blackened eyes.

This city of loved ones
O, how it smoulders, fading,
Wandering aimlessly
This caravan of the martyrs of love
Slowly, slowly moves.

O, where have the twilight evenings gone
Whence you and I sat quietly
On the porch
On chairs that faced each other.
And that beautiful plant
Placed strangely besides us
As if listening to our conversation
Our conversations were not laments
Neither forlorn complaints
It was the beginning of our lives' journey
Beautiful with anticipatory promises
Love's journey starting anew

Our faces shining in love's bright glow
Love's journey starting anew
Those sweet scented evenings
Smouldering, simmering
Enlaced with love's heady potion.

O, where have the yellow mornings gone
In whose shade we sat
Between the enclosure of the seas
The spring of your scarve's blooming shade
between the enclosure of the seas
Those twilight evenings, those yellow mornings
They have gone!

And now we sit here and there
Sadly in dew-drenched valleys
Under the extinguishing, smouldering lamp lights' shades
Quiet mornings, smouldering shadows
On the abandoned stairs of the alley
Engulfing us, smouldering us
 Making your sorrows go away
Making mine sorrows go away
These pegs of love's sweet wine
Deceptively heady
But with a hidden sword's edge
Burning, smouldering
Those, your sorrows
Those, mine sorrows
Sad evenings
Sad faces
That you come and sit besides me
This, my desire
This, my prayer
That but a moment's touch of thine kiss
Is my worship object
The ultimate
The beginning
O, where have the twilight evenings gone
O, where have the yellow mornings dispersed.

Meherzaidi..The poet.

Of a Sweet Forlorn Kiss.

She dreams of the rose that was so red as he put it in her golden tresses
Sweet scented as his face brushed ever so slightly against them
Silky, shiny golden tresses
Her sweetest smile, enhanced like a bejewelled crown with her pearly white teeth
Betwixt her rosy pink lips,
Hiding her soft, sensous mouth
Inviting to the hidden treasures of her person.
Love, oh what a sweet word,
Formed in his mind,
Waking up in her young heart.
The melodious lark sings on the bougainvillae boughs
She is happy with the advent of spring
The dew drops shine  tremolously
On the fresh green grass
Velvety beneath their feet.

Love's forlorn kiss,
Anticipated anxiously
Will it happen,
She cannot breath almost
Eyes closed, 
Wondering 
And then it is time to wake up!